Thanksgiving....trying to be thankful whether it sounds like it or not!

Still not much of a direction here. Found myself at 2am about to post my 3rd "paragraph" for the day and realized I hadn't even posted my one liner about Code Black (TV Series on after Criminal Minds on Wednesdays). Started to add to that post, and a half page later, I posted the one liner and cut and pasted the rest here. I am still unsure how to "go public" with this page and more unsure if I really want to. If only because of my new found annoyance at Microsoft, HP, whomever, who keep me just enough out of touch that I am nervous I will put my heart into something and it will disappear due to malfunction or I will get lost in some upgrade I never needed, nor asked for, nor got the memo on how to use. Anyway here is me, facebook-almost, 2am, and sharing with millions or talking to myself. Still unsure.

Got another letter from my sister. She must have been paying attention all along, as she sounds like a "normal" person, oddly in the most not normal place she could be, but if that is what it takes....Just barely got Julie's Obituary to her, haven't had a chance to tell her about Corey. She was telling me how she takes trips to have something in her throat....thyroid......now not sure which, anyway she said she has also applied to train dogs for Vets companions. (which is great, I posted something similar on here a while back) She said "I am a little worried I will be gone to the doctor when they come for the interviews for that job." She then said "certainly God wouldn't do that to me would he?" I wished I had better news for her. I wish I had perfect testimony to tell her that he wouldn't let that happen, or had anything to do with it, or noticed at all. I did notice that was twice, last letter she asked me to pray for her. I had Tonni tell me the other day when I was losing it "mom God wouldn't do that to you it is, and she pointed down". I started to go off on a rant that if there was a god and he was so almighty he WOULD do something to intervene....I stopped myself and told her thank you for correcting me, for sticking up for what she believes in, and that sometimes I am not the one who should be influencing my kids

And 7 hours later I wake up on the couch.  Find my PC about ready to reboot itself for whatever reason and almost lost another train of thought.  If I only had all the ramblings that were lost, accidentally deleted, stuck in a burned out hard drive, etc.  I could probably write a book.  At least I could fill in the gaps to one blog and have it make sense to anyone!  I still need to figure out how to creatively insert facial expressions and some sort of emoticon to express the varying moods and my sense of humor as well.

It is Thanksgiving.  Need to shower and accomplish something today.  Supposed to go to the in laws to eat.  My kids are on the 4th or 5th day of "the last chance to clean their room".  I think it has actually been going on since they were born.  3 girls, one room, 3 huge dressers and they can't seem to get their crap off the floor and their clothes in the dressers.  However they can cause general unrest in a whole family and manage to get out of completely finishing because we eventually have to leave the house for something.

Off to get ready and try to figure out why my font here is increasing with each paragraph.  It is giving me anxiety and making me feel like this should have all been gradually escalating to something Big and Exciting!!  But I have nothing.  Well, nothing good anyway.  It was inspiring me to start to add pictures.  Not of me of course.  As I type this my hands are going numb from either carpal tunnel or poor circulation.  I could obviously go on forever and life still goes on with 4 kids, a husband and a big fat dog who has no idea his job is to guard the house.

News for the week and from his brothers' page on FB 

At 6:30 pm Arizona time Today November 23, 2015 My brother Corey Passed Away for cancer complications.  Corey Plummer.

He had been a friend since about 9th grade, I am 46 now, haven't done the math but I do know outliving anyone I know is never easy.  More on that later.  Of to shower and try to look presentable for turkey day with the in-laws.  Finding out I was part Nez Perce indian when I was 32 has changed my view a little but just make light of most of it.  For Now...