Fathers Day

Well, that's a start.  Laughing.  

I started this blog approximately June 2014.  It was, I think, the last of many I attempted to start about a year ago.  Same idea at that time, to air out my head, put it all on paper and attempt to utilize a new found idea for earning a living--adding website links to a blog page to generate income when people used the links to shop.  Of course the original thought was Best Buy, Inc.  Where I worked from home doing customer service and computer sales for the holidays.  

So yesterday I posted my first ACTUAL post.  I figured i would come back here later and see what my original attempt was comprised of.  It was sitting under drafts for over 6 months.  Considering the title "Fathers Day", I assumed I had better be prepared for whatever I had written as, history shows a long laundry list of unofficial, unpublished, unseen by any other human type posts in "draft" boxes.  The are usually at minimum a page long full of things that needed attention at a later time when I was feeling "sane" and/or not so emotional.  I am even still feeling a anxious, laughing (always at myself before anyone else gets a shot, and I think my "white flag" way of saying "I'm nuts, but have a big a heart and a ton of easily crushed feelings" so go easy on me or I will cry) and guess what? Nothing--not one single word but the title!!  

Currently, 7-8 months later filling in the space with this!!!  

Taking a moment to remember why the day was emotional that it left me speechless.  Insert a short pause for reflection here.......I will have to think up a creative way to describe those--- minimize the actual words yet allow a "normal" human to experience how much thought actually goes into things before I write them or while I write them.  Sometimes a sentence takes an hour to write and loses the impact when only a few words or sentences are put in writing.  

So, "Fathers Day 2014", will be left for 2015.  I'm sure between this day and next year this time the significance will come to light.  With the father of my kids, my bio dad, my step dad and all the dad's that filled in the gap for them when I needed them, I'm sure it will eventually be very significant.